Be Not So Fearful: My 2018 in Review

tara lynne ageeksaga 2018

As I settle in to spend Christmas Eve with my family, eating and exchanging presents, followed by drinking wine and watching Elf with Bekah, I knew it was past time to write about what a crazy, unpredictable, yet somehow good, year 2018 was. So much of what happened this year was unexpected, and it really was a pleasant surprise after a very tough 2017.

In fact, last year a group of us from The Geekiary got together on New Year’s Eve and sent 2017 out with a big FUCK YOU. I then watched the ball drop with Brian, a person I met just over five years ago and who has since become one of my best friends. My very best, really.

To be honest, many of the people who I call my closest friends are people I’ve met within the past five years…which means they likely got to know me when I was at my worst, and then stuck with me through some of my darkest times.

This year, though…this year was different. It wasn’t always great – in fact, at times it was really, really damn hard – but more and more I’ve come to understand that after four years, I can finally, truthfully say that I’ve put myself back together. Yes, there are still pieces missing, and maybe they always will be…but I no longer let those pieces define me, or keep me from making deep connections with people.

I’m not even sure if this past year, and my ability to view it as an overall good year, is a cause or a product of my being so very nearly whole again. But now that 2018 is coming to an end, I can honestly say that I don’t think it matters.

I kicked off the year at MagFest, which was an entirely new experience to me. I got to hang out with Ice & Fire Con friends, play random old video games and pinball machines, watch late-night K-pop dance parties, and be part of a massive 5 AM McDonald’s delivery courtesy of a lawyer who works for (with?) Twitch. I’m not sure I’ll make it back to MagFest anytime soon, but I don’t usually get to truly begin the year with a convention, and I’m glad it was that one.

magfest 2018 tara lynne ageeksaga

That was followed by an extended visit from a good friend of mine, who came all the way from Australia (#sorrynotsorry Scott) to be tortured with caramel M&M’s, the Game of Thrones drinking game, and Hamilton (the musical, of course), among other things. Seriously, there are few things I love more than getting to spend time with convention friends outside of conventions 🙂

tara lynne ageeksaga 2018

In February I ran my first half marathon, Disney’s Princess Half, and wow was that one of the most difficult and amazing things I’ve ever done. I’ve never had a problem running a good 6 miles; I’ve even done so in the nearly 100-degree heat of a Florida summer. But more than 13 miles? I certainly couldn’t have done that back in my 20s, and despite the struggle of that last mile especially, despite the aches and pains I felt for days afterward, I am amazed at what my body can handle at this point in my life.

At what *I* can handle.

disney princess half marathon 2018 tara lynne ageeksaga

In fact, I ran the Star Wars 10K at Disney in April and at that point made my best 10K time ever…and celebrated by getting into Epcot before the park opened for an awesome breakfast, followed by riding Star Tours and drinking a lot of beer.

That was at the beginning of April; later that month was the sixth Ice & Fire Con, and it was…well, it was the best Ice & Fire Con since the very first one, and as the four conventions in between were all awesome, that’s saying something. And while all of that certainly bares repeating, there’s not much need to wax reminiscent about the experience as a whole, since I already did that in my annual Ice & Fire Con love letter.

wizarding world of harry potter 2018 tara lynne ageeksaga

May brought a visit from my good friend from high school, Judith, and although we only had about two days together, her visit combined with The United States of Americon (formerly KiwiCon) made for a great end to my time living in Orlando. Most of the summer was rough; the move itself was not easy, for so many reasons, and then I spent a long time just…getting settled again. There’s more to it than that, of course, but at least those months of struggle had a few high points – like attending the wedding of Ashley and Keith, THE OTP and two of the absolute best people I know.

tara lynne ageeksaga 2018

Right after “Keishleycon” was SDCC, and while that convention is always hit or miss for me, this year was definitely the former. Not only did I get to spend a lot of time with some Ice & Fire Con people and see those relationships grow, but I had great roommates, got to know some acquaintances a bit better, and hit it off with some entirely new friends.

sdcc 2018 tara lynne ageeksaga

I always count Dragon Con as the end of the summer, and this year was definitely one of my best Dragon Cons yet. I wore a lot of costumes, was on a lot of panels, and (surprise surprise?) spent most of my time with Ice & Fire Con pals. It was lovely to have some of those Ice & Fire Con friendships grow at/because of Dragon Con, and I still found time to get to know some other friends better, as well.

dragon con 2018 tara lynne ageeksaga

This fall brought its own challenges, but thankfully I had the best of people by my side, whether they were just listening to me, helping to distract me, or giving me advice. Then I hosted some more visitors and an awesome Halloween party, bested my April 10K time at the Disney Food & Wine 10K, and got to spend basically the entire month of November losing myself in Red Dead Redemption 2.

The year culminated in a birthday extravaganza that’s up there with my 2016 “Florida Bounding” trip and my 30th birthday in Vegas in 2012. I hadn’t been on a straight-up vacation – one in which wasn’t speaking/working at a convention or in a wedding – in two years, and the last time I went on a vacation for more than a few days was back in the summer of 2015. Being able to take the entire week of my birthday off and spend it in California, visiting Disneyland and LA, and then stopping off in Vegas for four days of craziness, was a perfect end to my XXth year on this earth…and an even more perfect beginning to the next one 😉

tara lynne ageeksaga disneyland 2018
tara lynne ageeksaga las vegas 2018

There was certainly more to 2018 than races and visitors and vacations, and I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the more ‘everyday’ highlights – things like finally launching my own podcast, having [perhaps too much] fun with The Bitching Dead webcast, helping launch the Greenville chapter of Geek Girl Brunch, taking my niece to a baseball game for her birthday, watching the Red Sox win the world series again…shoot, just generally falling in love with Greenville again.

tara lynne ageeksaga red sox greenville drive 2018

And in case it wasn’t clear, my friends were such a large part of what made this year amazing. To everyone who helped me make all of the aforementioned memories…to everyone who took the time to get to know me, and to let me get to know you…thank you for being you and may 2019 bring you great things <3

As for me? I’m going to barrel into 2019 with a carnival-themed New Year’s Eve party, another Disney half marathon, and a lengthy Ice & Fire Con to-do list…and the hope that I can make next year another good one.

Be not so nervous, be not so frail
Someone watches you, you will not fail
Be not so nervous, be not so frail
Be not so nervous, be not so frail

Be not so sorry for what you’ve done
You must forget them now, it’s done
And when you wake up you will find that you can run
Be not so sorry for what you’ve done
Be not so sorry for what you’ve done

Be not so fearful, be not so pale
Someone watches you, you will not leave the rails
Be not so fearful, be not so pale
Be not so fearful, be not so pale

Be not so sorry for what you’ve done
You must forget them now, it’s done
And when you wake up you will find that you can run
Be not so sorry for what you’ve done
Be not so sorry for what you’ve done

tara lynne ageeksaga 2018

NaNoWriMo 2018 Kickoff – A Flashback to 2016

I miss participating in NaNoWriMo, but I know that my current work schedule doesn’t exactly lend itself to writing over 1,600 words a day, every day, for a month. That said, in 2016 I started writing a modern version of The Picture of Dorian Grey for NaNo, and while I know there’s next to no chance that I will actually write 50,000 words this month (or even write every day, because I’m actually on vacation and very busily so from today until late Monday), I thought I would share the first chapter that I wrote about two years ago, in hopes that it will encourage me to – at the very least – write more. And so, without further ado, Chapter 1 of A Photo of Dorienne…

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Falling for Greenville All Over Again

I think it’s very fitting that I am sitting down to write this blog entry exactly 9 years after I moved back to Greenville from a year-long stint in Connecticut, because here’s the thing: no matter where I end up going, I always end up coming back here.

Without going into too much detail, my “Greenville story” began with me following my parents to the upstate area. They moved here in the fall of 2006 and after visiting several times, I fell in love and wasn’t far behind. I lived here from March 2007 until November 2008, when work took me back to my home state of Connecticut. At the time I was in need of a change – that’s honestly how these moves of mine usually go – but that need for change didn’t last very long, and so on October 19, 2009, I packed up my car and made my way back to Greenville, presumably for good.

However, I ended up in need of a change again and had several things conspire to pull me to Orlando in August 2016…but while I enjoyed a lot about my time there, I’ll be honest: I left my heart in Greenville. That, combined with the need to make some pretty major repairs to my home here, led to my returning in June of this year…and while a lot about this return wasn’t easy, the more time I spend here, the more I understand that it was the best choice for me.

I love the weather (even when I hate it).

I love being close to such great hiking and beautiful natural areas.

I love the Greenville Drive (and the fact that they’re a Red Sox farm team).

I love my house.

I love living close to my family.

I love my friends here.

I love how the shorter distances and more manageable traffic (if there is any at all) make it easier to actually see those friends.

I love, love, love downtown Greenville.

downtown greenville sc farmer's market

I’ve been making it my goal to get out and about and experience this city the way I used to before my life became a crazy whirlwind of writing and convention planning, and I’m pretty proud of how much I’ve done, from just grabbing happy hour (or late night) drinks with friends to visiting the Greenville farmer’s market, from spending afternoons downtown playing Pokemon Go to having a table at a local library’s convention (Electric City Comicon), from attending the opening of a new brewery (Fire Forge) to finally going to another Drive game.

fire forge brewery greenville sc

greenville drive ageeksaga tara lynne

And then last weekend I got to experience Fall for Greenville – our annual local food and music event – for the first time since 2015, and while it certainly has its cons (mostly the crowds and how expensive it’s gotten in recent years), spending an entire afternoon and evening eating and drinking my way through downtown with some great people just cemented the fact that I am HOME.

ageeksaga tara lynne fall for greenville 2018

ageeksaga tara lynne fall for greenville 2018

ageeksaga tara lynne fall for greenville 2018

It also helps that I’m going out of my way to find ways to be involved. I’ve moderated the Greenville subreddit for years (which has certainly had its ups and downs), but more recently I started volunteering for the Upstate SC Cosplay group and also became an officer for the Greenville chapter of Geek Girl Brunch. I’m loving every bit of all of this and continue to be on the lookout for more ways to truly be a part of this local community.

geek girl brunch greenville sc

Prudence & I (GGB Greenville officers) with Bekah after our Harry Potter themed brunch

Now if only I could finish my home renovations, everything would be absolutely perfect 😉 Regardless, I’m back in Greenville, falling in love with it all over again, and I think this time I’ve learned my lesson and am here for good.

The Geek Saga Podcast Episode 24: White Walkers, Wargs, & Weirwoods, Oh My! Panel at Dragon Con 2018

tara lynne's geek saga podcast

Episode 24 of The Geek Saga Podcast includes live audio from the Dragon Con High Fantasy track’s “White Walkers, Wargs, & Weirwoods, Oh My!” panel from Dragon Con 2018.

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Westeros is full of ancient and magical forces, and while we spent quite a bit of this panel discussing the White Walkers in particular, we also touched on wargs and weirwoods and what all these things mean for/in the world that GRRM has created.

Panelists: Myself, Andrew d’Adesky, Ashley M, Rebecca Fant

The Geek Saga Podcast Episode 23: Loony Game of Thrones Theories at Dragon Con 2018

tara lynne's geek saga podcast

Episode 23 of Tara Lynne’s A Geek Saga Podcast includes live audio from the Dragon Con High Fantasy track’s “Loony ASOIAF/Game of Thrones Theories” panel from Dragon Con 2018.

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The 2017 Loony Theories crew is back with more crazy and ridiculous Song of Ice and Fire/Game of Thrones theories!

Panelists: Myself, Andrew d’Adesky, Brian E, Chloe K, Jennifer Liang

geek saga podcast episode 23 loony game of thrones theories dragon con 2018

The Geek Saga Podcast Episode 22: Drinkin’ Con 2018 (The Hangover)

tara lynne's geek saga podcast

Episode 22 of The Geek Saga Podcast was originally aired as a live webcast, “Drinkin’ Con 2018: The Hangover” on September 13, 2018.

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The Drinkin’ Con v2.0 crew is back to talk about their Dragon Con 2018 cons, pros, favorite cosplays and memorable moments!

CHEERS!

geek saga podcast episode 22

The Geek Saga Podcast Episode 21: Religion in High Fantasy Panel at Dragon Con 2018

tara lynne's geek saga podcast

Episode 21 of The Geek Saga Podcast includes live audio from the Dragon Con High Fantasy track’s “Religion in High Fantasy” panel from Dragon Con 2018.

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This panel featured experts on GRRM, Tolkien, CS Lewis, and more, discussing both the obvious and not-so-obvious appearance of real life religion in high fantasy works.

Panelists: Myself, Jim Wert, Kirsten Z. Cairns, Tim Powers, Constance G.J. Wagner

The Geek Saga Podcast: Episode 20, There Must Always Be a Stark at Dragon Con 2018

tara lynne's geek saga podcast

Episode 20 of TheGeek Saga Podcast includes live audio from the Dragon Con High Fantasy track’s “There Must Always Be a Stark at Dragon Con” panel from Dragon Con 2018.

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There must always be a Stark at Dragon Con in Winterfell, and this panel focused on House Stark, why Winterfell needs them (and vice versa) and more!

Panelists: Myself, Andrew d’Adesky, Chloe K, Aleron Kong

geek saga podcast episode 20 house stark dragon con 2018

The Geek Saga Podcast Episode 19: Sons of the Dragon Con 2018 Panel

tara lynne's geek saga podcast

Episode 19 of The Geek Saga Podcast includes live audio from the Dragon Con High Fantasy track’s “Sons of the Dragon” panel from Dragon Con 2018.

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This panel focused on George R.R. Martin’s Sons of the Dragon novella, published in last year’s Book of Swords anthology. We discussed the succession issues after Aegon the Conqueror’s death and the reign of Maegor the Cruel, as well as possible probable parallels to the current A Song of Ice and Fire timeline.

Panelists: Myself, Andrew D’Adesky, Jennifer Liang

The Geek Saga Podcast Episode 18: Dragon Con 2018 Join the Resistance Panel

tara lynne's geek saga podcast

Episode 18 of The Geek Saga Podcast includes live audio from the Dragon Con Apocalypse Rising track’s panel called “Join the Resistance: Dystopias of Change” from Dragon Con 2018.

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This panel examined how dystopias often focus on issues within our society, government, and culture. We discussed such works as The Hunger Games, Mad Max Fury Road, Red Rising, and our own works as we focused on why dystopian media continues to engage and change our culture for the better.

Panelists: Myself, CB Lee, Ben Fisher, F.T. Lukens, Richard Kadrey

geek saga podcast episode 18 join the resistance dragon con 2018